THE NUDIE NUDIE PORNO SEX BLOG

Well, it's been a while, but since no one voted for their post of choice (sniff, sniff) I have selected the topic for today.

Have you noticed how pornographic the Olympics have become? I don't want to sound like an old fogey, but I know I'm not alone in noticing the disparity between the attire of the male and female competitors, especially in the track & field and beach volleyball events. I almost had to turn off the gold medal final featuring Kerri Walsh and Misty May-Treanor vs. the Chinese team, with the two teams battling it out on the fake beach in their skimpy bikinis which also happened to be soaked through because of a driving rain. What? No tent for the beach volleyball? I almost had to turn the whole thing off out of guilt, but then I had to Tivo it and watch it again just because I couldn't believe what I was seeing. Then I had to watch it in slow motion just to provide specific details about just how ridiculous the outfits were. Then I had to watch it yet again, because somehow the first three times I saw it I didn't notice if we won the damn gold medal or not.

Really.

Go to Salon.com and search the archive of the week's essays and you'll see a more serious discussion of how the IOC arbitrarily makes its rules on wardrobe all the while totally pandering to network television, especially NBC.

(By the way, don't tell me that men are just as exploited as the women are in the swimming and diving events. Everyone going into a pool has to wear swimwear--the guys on the beach volleyball court and running around the track don't have to show half as much as the women do and that's because, let's be honest, the women's events would probably never be in primetime otherwise.)

My Choice for the Three Most Impressive Olympic Performances So Far:
1) Michael Phelps - duh
2) Nastia Lukin
3) Bela Karolyi - that guy is stone cold CRAZY! Who knew he'd be so interesting on TV. Bob Costas doesn't know whether to slap him on the back or put him on a leash!

A Few Sentences About TROPIC THUNDER

Tracy and I loved this movie despite the fact that it's crude, rude, politically incorrect, occasionally racist and unbelievably loud (it makes THE DARK KNIGHT sound like it's set in a library). The key to the movie's success are twofold: underneath all the crass, sophomoric humor, there's a pretty sharp and painfully accurate satire about the egos of actors and the venality of show business in general. And secondly, there's Tom Cruise.

It's not widely advertised that Cruise is in this movie (I'm sorry if I ruined the surprise, but it's not exactly a secret either) and I won't give away the greatest thing about his appearance in the movie, but I will say this--he has three scenes and he walks off with the picture. It's Cruise at his most over the top and most hilarious.

The plot is unimportant--think THE THREE AMIGOS crossed with THE PLAYER and PLATOON. A group of big name actors and a director inadvertantly get stranded in the jungle while making a Vietnam war movie and their star (played with typical vain cluelessness by Ben Stiller, who also co-wrote and directed) doesn't realize that the cameras are no longer rolling. Add a gang of heroin makers led by a crazed 12-year old, an egocentric master thespian who dyes himself black to play an African-American (Robert Downey Jr, who gives the best sustained performance in the movie) and Jack Black and you've got your movie. Be prepared to laugh, cringe and that laugh some more.

Rated 'R' for comic gore, violence, profanity and extreme lack of political correctness. Stars Ben Stiller, Robert Downey Jr., Jack Black, Brandon T. Jackson, Jay Baruchel, Matthew McConaughey and Tom Cruise. Written by Stiller, Justin Theroux and Etan Cohen. Directed by Ben Stiller.

Peace...